Staying Positive
Happy Day this and thatters!
I hope you and yours are doing fantastic.
I have to tell you that I'm really trying to keep my perspective this holiday season (and failing at it more often times than not). The hubs and I have both been extremely busy at work which leaves little time for anything else. The hubs has been leaving at 5 a.m. and coming home around 8 p.m. He's exhausted!
I have been working hard and then trying to hold down the fort (so to speak) on my own so he can work as hard as he needs to right now. We have been treading along like this for a few weeks. Work, sleep, repeat. Throw in the chaos of the holidays, Christmas shopping, parties and a thousand obligations and you guessed it we hit a wall.
Nothing particularly crazy happened I just hit a point where I felt like I needed a break. I called the hubs while he was at work and had a break down. He in turn confirmed he's ridiculously stressed out as well. We got it all out that this set up of constantly working and not seeing each other isn't working.
So what now? What do we do? How do we right the ship? All I knew to do is what I always do which is work extremely hard to get us organized. That includes planning meals, planning date nights and being sure everyone is on the same page about the days and weeks ahead. I also cannot do everything around the house alone the hubs has to help, period. I gave him a list of items he can do that will take the load of off me a bit.
I also realized that we have to make time for each other. That we have to carve time out of each day to connect on some level. That all this working, obligations and errands are huge distractions to what's important. That the foundation of this life we are creating is us. That if we aren't connected than all of this working is in vain.
That doesn't mean I don't have to go to the grocery store or he doesn't have to take out the trash. Those things have to happen for us to survive. We have to look at these chores and errands as things we are doing together for our family. Not hold them up as a running list of what I did vs what you did.
And finally I realized we have to count our blessings and stay positive in the midst of the mess. I obsessively listen to Joel Osteen radio on XM (feel free to judge). Whenever he is asked by reporters or the press what he would tell someone to do when they are down or don't know what to do he always says find something to be thankful for. Find one thing you can thank God for that day. Then the next day find something else. It helps to change your perspective.
In the middle of feeling like I was sinking on a ship I thanked God for Emily and for letting me be her mother. I thanked him for the full life he has given me and I kept plowing through my day. Later on that day I felt happiness in my heart and I know it's because I stopped and thanked God for what's important.
I know I'm going to loose my perspective again, get overwhelmed and feel like a nervous breakdown is imminent but I'm hoping I can remember how blessed I am even when that is happening. That I won't give up hope that all the hard work, stress and errands are worth it.
That building this life together is worth all the hard work, late nights and crazy days.
I'm going to work to stay positive and be nice to myself. I'm going to be ok with the days that I don't shower, Emily wears only a diaper for most of the day and we eat leftovers standing up in the kitchen. Because that's real life. That isn't on my Christmas card or yours but maybe it should be :)
In this holiday season I hope you can slow down here and there and love on who is important to you (and yourself). I also hope you can remember that we are all doing the best we can and your best is absolutely good enough!
xoxo
I hope you and yours are doing fantastic.
I have to tell you that I'm really trying to keep my perspective this holiday season (and failing at it more often times than not). The hubs and I have both been extremely busy at work which leaves little time for anything else. The hubs has been leaving at 5 a.m. and coming home around 8 p.m. He's exhausted!
I have been working hard and then trying to hold down the fort (so to speak) on my own so he can work as hard as he needs to right now. We have been treading along like this for a few weeks. Work, sleep, repeat. Throw in the chaos of the holidays, Christmas shopping, parties and a thousand obligations and you guessed it we hit a wall.
Nothing particularly crazy happened I just hit a point where I felt like I needed a break. I called the hubs while he was at work and had a break down. He in turn confirmed he's ridiculously stressed out as well. We got it all out that this set up of constantly working and not seeing each other isn't working.
So what now? What do we do? How do we right the ship? All I knew to do is what I always do which is work extremely hard to get us organized. That includes planning meals, planning date nights and being sure everyone is on the same page about the days and weeks ahead. I also cannot do everything around the house alone the hubs has to help, period. I gave him a list of items he can do that will take the load of off me a bit.
I also realized that we have to make time for each other. That we have to carve time out of each day to connect on some level. That all this working, obligations and errands are huge distractions to what's important. That the foundation of this life we are creating is us. That if we aren't connected than all of this working is in vain.
That doesn't mean I don't have to go to the grocery store or he doesn't have to take out the trash. Those things have to happen for us to survive. We have to look at these chores and errands as things we are doing together for our family. Not hold them up as a running list of what I did vs what you did.
And finally I realized we have to count our blessings and stay positive in the midst of the mess. I obsessively listen to Joel Osteen radio on XM (feel free to judge). Whenever he is asked by reporters or the press what he would tell someone to do when they are down or don't know what to do he always says find something to be thankful for. Find one thing you can thank God for that day. Then the next day find something else. It helps to change your perspective.
In the middle of feeling like I was sinking on a ship I thanked God for Emily and for letting me be her mother. I thanked him for the full life he has given me and I kept plowing through my day. Later on that day I felt happiness in my heart and I know it's because I stopped and thanked God for what's important.
I know I'm going to loose my perspective again, get overwhelmed and feel like a nervous breakdown is imminent but I'm hoping I can remember how blessed I am even when that is happening. That I won't give up hope that all the hard work, stress and errands are worth it.
That building this life together is worth all the hard work, late nights and crazy days.
I'm going to work to stay positive and be nice to myself. I'm going to be ok with the days that I don't shower, Emily wears only a diaper for most of the day and we eat leftovers standing up in the kitchen. Because that's real life. That isn't on my Christmas card or yours but maybe it should be :)
In this holiday season I hope you can slow down here and there and love on who is important to you (and yourself). I also hope you can remember that we are all doing the best we can and your best is absolutely good enough!
xoxo
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